A subtle way to flirt is to sincerely complement women. Women go out of their way to feed their ego and fish for compliments. A beautiful brunette will ruin her natural look by dying her hair blonde. A beautiful natural blonde would do away with what makes her unique by becoming a brunette like everyone else. Fair-skinned women are told that they need to get some color by going to the tanning salon. Women with naturally beautiful gold tans are told to use whitening lotion to look more fair-skinned. All women love compliments, especially after they went out of their way to change something about themselves. Feed their egos. Tell them you like the change – but only if you really mean it.
Although I’ve read that men should only complimenting girls from the neck up, Ron Louis and David Copeland of How to Succeed with Women say that being caught looking below her neck is not a bad thing either. If she catches you noticing other parts of her body, she’ll start thinking about whether or not you should be allowed to look at those parts. I don’t disagree. Sometimes, it’s good for her to know that you’re interested in her sexually, but there’s a fine line between showing that interest as a male and showing that interest as a pervert. Here’s my take on what to compliment a girl in so that you can make her feel better about herself:
1) Her shoes – Why did the infamous first lady of the Philippines, Imelda Marcos, steal from her people to purchase over 1,200 pairs of designer shoes? Because many women feel that shoes make the entire outfit. Compliment them on what they deem is the most important choice they made in their outfit. Tell them that you love the way their shoes match their dresses, which are elegantly complimented their choice of jewelry. They put effort into those decisions. Tell them that you appreciate the effort.
2) Her hair – Do you know how much effort goes into making straight hair curly and curly hair straight? Women have to wear curlers for hours, spray their curls, sleep with rollers and wear showers cap before re-spraying their curls again so that the curls glisten when the women walk out of the house. And those women probably looked better with their naturally straight hair. If you are being sincere, tell a woman that you love her new look. If you’re already close to her, consider touching her hair. If she is positively receptive to your touch, you’re getting closer to what you want.
3) Her outfit – A woman with a closet full of clothes, some with tags on them, will still go shopping for a new dress before a party. This is part of the “red carpet” culture that we live in today. Indulge her. Tell her that you appreciate her putting thought and effort into making sure her outfit beautiful and fit for the occasion. She is fishing for compliments. Give her your fish.
4) Her accessories – This is a nice and safe way to get to know a girl without being intrusive. Most girls have something on their wrist, whether it is a wristband or bracelet. Ask them about it. Simply say, “Nice bracelet. What does it mean?” You’re bound to get a story about who gave her the bracelet or why she bought it. Use this as a starting point for your conversation. You should wear an interesting and meaningful piece of jewelry on your wrist as well. Tell her an interesting story about your bracelet and then you build rapport as two people with meaningful bracelets.
5) Her writing – In general, women tend to be better writers than men. They have much pent up frustration in this male-dominated society and they are used to venting it out on pen and paper. You’ve probably read some poetic social media by a women eager to have their thoughts heard. Read what they write. Compliment their writing, but don’t play amateur psychologist with them, and don’t give advice. A simple, “I know what you’re going through and I know you’ll overcome it” is enough to let them know that they are appreciated. Replying with a comment that shows empathy could lead to a woman talking to you about her feelings. Your being a lending ear online, could lead to your listening to them on the phone, then in person, and so on.
6) Her pictures - Why do girls constantly take selfies? Because they are living works of art and they know it. Imagine if you spent last night straightening your hair, reshaping your eyebrows, and throwing all sorts of rings in your ears, nose and navel. Imagine that you also spent $100 to color and cut your hair at the salon, and an additional $100 and one hour putting on your eyeliner, mascara, foundation, etc. After hundreds of dollars and hours of work on your looks, is it ok to take a picture to revel in your masterpiece? Of course. Show a woman that you appreciate her hard work with a simple, “you look great.” This will make her feel good and all women love being around a man who makes them feel good.
Notice that I did not say that you should ever compliment a woman’s boobs or butt. That’s what heathens do. A woman knows she has breasts. She’s known them since age 11 or so. She’s heard enough uninvited compliments about them and if she hasn’t, she doesn’t need you to give her the first. She’s been brought up to know that guys notice them. She also doesn’t need to tell her that she has a “nice ass” because she gets more catcalls from our misogynistic society than she would like. She will appreciate compliments from a man who can be creative. Be the creative genius who notices the hard work she puts into appearing attractive. Wouldn’t you like to be around someone who comes up with creative ways to tell you you’re wonderful?